Sabotage

Hi, All!

How are you doing? 🌈

I’m sitting by the bank now, doing pretty fine.

But before this, there was the rush.

It always happens like this.

I stop eating my frogs first thing in the morning. And I let my mind hoax me into what-else and what-more.

I add one more to-do to the list. And then another. I start to read three books at the same time, then four. I take up a new project or two and toss in a few dinners too many and a spring cleaning–why not.

I tell myself I’m in control until it’s indisputable that I’m not.

This time around, my body complained first, but I let it slide, and like that, set the recovery of my knee injury back with days.

And since that wasn’t enough of a cry to pull me out, my mind followed with a minor meltdown.

At last, I found myself spat out on the side, left to trace the domino that had pushed me into the tide.

It took a phone call with a friend to catch my breath. And another day to recognize the tile for what it was.

Self-sabotage.

For when things go well, and I’m making my deadlines and striking that list, I like to decide last minute that what I really need is to stall.

But I’m learning to catch myself sooner. Dry up a bit quicker. And pick up the pieces that are still left standing. Even if I fall.

Quote That’s Been On My Mind

If you want to enjoy the rewards of being loved, you also have to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known. –Tim Kreider, I Wrote This Book Because I Love You

With love,
Mirha
🌤